One of the teachers at my language school invited me to the wedding reception for one of her friends. It was a very interesting cultural experience.
The day began like any ordinary wedding: The bride spending hours getting ready and the groom just hanging out with his guy friends. However, this day was not the actually wedding. The day before, the bride, the groom, their parents, and a person from the religion office for cousins met in their home. They both were dressed in traditional Javanese clothing. The groom gave the bride money ($100), gold jewelry, one new dress, shoes, and makeup. Then they each signed a marriage certificate. After the certificate was signed the bride kissed the groom's hand. How's that for showing affection?!
The next day was the 'reception.' After the bride and groom were ready, their friends and family came to their house and gave their congratulations. Then, we all followed the bride and groom up the road to a large tent. As we were walking, some of the ladies noticed that Dan and I had not brought a gift (traditionally baked sweets) so a lady who made two things politely put a container of sweets in my hand. She didn't say a word but I got the jist. As we entered the tent, the immediate family were all standing up front receiving the gifts and shaking everyone's hands. I gave 'my' gift and greeted the family. Then it was time to eat. The tables were full of beautiful sweets (I just wish they tasted as good as they looked. 'Sweets' here in Indonesia are really not that sweet. Most Indonesians think Americans sweets have way too much sugar. What is really interesting to me is that they put about 3 spoon fulls of sugar in a tiny cup of coffee or tea.)
As I talked with my friends at the table it wasn't long before a camera literally was right in front of my face. For the remainder of the evening it seemed that everyone wanted to get their photo taken with the 'bule' (white person).
The family also served dinner. When I went through the line I looked around and thought no one was watching so, I only put on my plate what I liked (which really isn't much). Not even a minute after I sat back down at my table, the cook came over and looked at my plate. She was very concerned and didn't understand why I didn't have any peanut sauce on my food. Not knowing what to say and not wanting to offend her and everyone else who had gathered around the table I said, "Saya tidak bisa makan kacang." With this simple statement I received lots of head nods and understanding. The cook excused herself and moments later she returned with different food. I graciously smiled and thanked her but inwardly I was laughing. I didn't like this food either. Hmm. . .what could I say this time. Oh, are you wondering what I said the first time? "I can not eat peanuts." I thought of saying the second time, "I can not eat fried things that are gross" but I thought I better keep my thoughts to myself considering I had to repent already for the first untrue statement.
The celebration was coming to a close but of course everyone wants their picture with the bride and groom right?! Nope. They want their picture with the bules! So, Dan and I stood up with the bride and groom and it seemed that every guest came and got the picture taken with us.
The day began like any ordinary wedding: The bride spending hours getting ready and the groom just hanging out with his guy friends. However, this day was not the actually wedding. The day before, the bride, the groom, their parents, and a person from the religion office for cousins met in their home. They both were dressed in traditional Javanese clothing. The groom gave the bride money ($100), gold jewelry, one new dress, shoes, and makeup. Then they each signed a marriage certificate. After the certificate was signed the bride kissed the groom's hand. How's that for showing affection?!
The next day was the 'reception.' After the bride and groom were ready, their friends and family came to their house and gave their congratulations. Then, we all followed the bride and groom up the road to a large tent. As we were walking, some of the ladies noticed that Dan and I had not brought a gift (traditionally baked sweets) so a lady who made two things politely put a container of sweets in my hand. She didn't say a word but I got the jist. As we entered the tent, the immediate family were all standing up front receiving the gifts and shaking everyone's hands. I gave 'my' gift and greeted the family. Then it was time to eat. The tables were full of beautiful sweets (I just wish they tasted as good as they looked. 'Sweets' here in Indonesia are really not that sweet. Most Indonesians think Americans sweets have way too much sugar. What is really interesting to me is that they put about 3 spoon fulls of sugar in a tiny cup of coffee or tea.)
As I talked with my friends at the table it wasn't long before a camera literally was right in front of my face. For the remainder of the evening it seemed that everyone wanted to get their photo taken with the 'bule' (white person).
The family also served dinner. When I went through the line I looked around and thought no one was watching so, I only put on my plate what I liked (which really isn't much). Not even a minute after I sat back down at my table, the cook came over and looked at my plate. She was very concerned and didn't understand why I didn't have any peanut sauce on my food. Not knowing what to say and not wanting to offend her and everyone else who had gathered around the table I said, "Saya tidak bisa makan kacang." With this simple statement I received lots of head nods and understanding. The cook excused herself and moments later she returned with different food. I graciously smiled and thanked her but inwardly I was laughing. I didn't like this food either. Hmm. . .what could I say this time. Oh, are you wondering what I said the first time? "I can not eat peanuts." I thought of saying the second time, "I can not eat fried things that are gross" but I thought I better keep my thoughts to myself considering I had to repent already for the first untrue statement.
The celebration was coming to a close but of course everyone wants their picture with the bride and groom right?! Nope. They want their picture with the bules! So, Dan and I stood up with the bride and groom and it seemed that every guest came and got the picture taken with us.
